Today is the seventh anniversary of my mother’s death.
A pitfall of life is getting caught up in the race to be more, be ahead of the game, be pushing for the next whatever, be comparing ourselves to the past…essentially occupying any moment other than the present.
The work of healing grief can be like growing a garden. Plants and flowers need water, sunlight, and plenty of weeding to grow and thrive.
Grievers are often encouraged to “move forward” after a loss. Such societal pressure may leave grievers feeling stalled and stuck if they don’t “move forward” quickly and surely. The result can be a sense of hopelessness, depression, or anxiety that takes root in the griever’s life.
Grief is overwhelming, and grievers may frequently turn to their grief supporters for help getting through the initial trauma of loss and then healing. Some grief supporters are really great at being there for the griever in their lives, others aren’t as helpful. While being surrounded by amazing support is important for grievers, even theContinue reading “Monday Meditation: Give me an “I””
Grief throws many things at you in fast succession; it is overwhelming. Grievers may barely get a break between one thing and the next. Sometimes it’s hard to breathe; reality can feel too real at times and it can be tempting to avoid it or numb ourselves to forget about it.
To change the movement of your path, you just need to take one step each day. These steps don’t have to be big, they can be as small as you would like. The point is to take them. Grief can and will feel overwhelming when we overthink its presence and let it accumulate a cloudContinue reading “Monday Meditation: One Day, One Thing.”
Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding. -Khalil Gibran Loss comes with pain; emotional and physical. Unfortunately, it is part of the process and we cannot get around it. Often, we seek ways to avoid the pain, to numb ourselves to it. Some distractions are healthy, others not. While theContinue reading “Monday Meditation: The Role of Pain”
There is nothing permanent except change. -Heraclitus We are slowly approaching the new season and the new year, the changing of our calendar. Each year we either look toward these changes with excitement or with trepidation. Regardless, change comes. We can count on very little in life to be predictable, except change. We may notContinue reading “Monday Meditation: Certain Change”
By giving to others out of love, we receive the things we need most this time of year: love and comfort.
Heavy hearts, like heavy clouds in the sky, are best relieved by the letting of a little water. -Christopher Morley Crying is good for you. Tears reduce stress hormones from your body, the remove irritants and lubricate your eye, and tears also contain antibodies. Our emotional tears help stress leave our body and increase endorphinsContinue reading “Monday Meditation: Go ahead, have a good cry.”
Healthy habits tend to disappear when intense stress arrives. We stop exercising, we sleep less, we eat poorly, we stop making health care appointments. Non-grief-related stressors tend to come in bursts that dissipate after a time, allowing us to resume our regular healthy living habits. Grief, on the other hand, brings long-term stress that includesContinue reading “Keep Healthy Habits”
If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading. -Lao Tzu Imagine life as a highway. You’re driving along, and you realize that you are going in a direction you hadn’t intended or the way you thought you wanted to go is turning into something you had not expected. YourContinue reading “Monday Meditation: Allow for Self-Correction”
When we are no longer able to change a situation—we are challenged to change ourselves. -Viktor Frankl In the wake of a loss, we may pray that someone we know has the ability to raise the dead. Unfortunately, no one does and death remains an unchangeable situation. Frankl, who spent time in Auschwitz, knows muchContinue reading “Monday Meditation: A Challenge to Change”
The point of power is always in the present moment. -Louise L. Hay In grief, we may tend to worry about what happened in the past or what awaits us in the future. By doing so, we worry about things we can no longer change and things that we cannot foresee. The present moment, theContinue reading “Monday Meditation: Be Present”